It's all about the attitude...

So today, I'm at job #1, talking to K (the broke one), about this new book I'm currently reading (Millionaire by 30). She asked what type of book it was, and I responded that so far, it's more of a narrative than a guidebook, but that the author is absolutely hilarious and I'm really enjoying the book. She scoffs, and then responds "yeah, that's why he's a millionaire - he's charismatic - the kind of guy who could sell ice to eskimos... those of us who aren't charismatic are screwed".

That comment really threw me off guard for several reasons:

1) The author of the book doesn't strike me as a particularly charismatic person.
2) The book (so far) speaks nothing of selling, just of investing.
3) That's a very self-defeating attitude.

I didn't argue with her, since I don't really enjoy arguing with her, but in my mind I was saying to myself "That's why, K, you're going to be in debt for the rest of your life". It's becomming more and more apparent to me that having a positive outlook on life really does help.

I got another insight into her bleak outlook on life as we were driving to the mall today. I noticed a crack in her windsheild in the upper right-hand side (way out of her view) and stated that I hoped the crack, instead of spreading across the windshield, would just turn around out of sight. Again, she scoffed, saying that it was, of course, going to spread across the windsheild because that's what happens to her.

I'm not sure how much pessimism I can take...

Now, i'm not always a perky person. I consider myself a realist, neither pessimist or optimist. However, people who are constantly pessimistic drive me nuts!

It's not just that they have a bleak outlook on life, it's that they refuse to be helped (or even nudged) out of that attitude.

For example, here would be a conversation we would have at the office:

L: So, K, where do you wanna go for lunch?
K: I don't know, I'm so broke.
L: Well, we can just go downstairs to the cafeteria or just grab some fries.
K: Yeah, but that's so boring. Let's just go to (random fast food joint).
L: Okay sounds good. At least we get paid in (x amount of days).
K: Ya, but you get paid more than me and I have this bill and that bill and then I don't have any money left until the 15th and then I have more bills and I bought this and now my MasterCard payment is x more than it was last month and then I only have $4 to my name until next month.
L: *shrug*. You could just bring food from home?
K: But there's no food in my house and I get so bored bringing food and my dad always eats the leftovers and I have to buy groceries and blah blah blah.
L: *double shrug* Er......

(In all fairness, I do get paid more than her. We both technically get paid $12 an hour, but when I filled out my employment forms, I opted not to have extra taxes taken off, while she opted for having more taxes taken out, in the hopes of getting them back at tax time....I'd rather have my money now, thank-you-very-much. She seems to enjoy the tax-time windfall).

It's just the principal. My thoughts are, don't complain if you don't want the help. I don't enjoy other people butting into my buisness unless I ask for it, which is why I rarely complain. If I complain about things, generally I want help, or i'm being a bitch that day.

Arrrgh. It drives me nuts! It's like she's resigned herself to being in debt forever. Bah. I hate it.

It's too bad, since I really enjoy her company. But, it's no fun when every outing is tainted with her money-talk....

Cheesecake

My boss' sister D, as nice as she is, made me some cheesecake on Tuesday. As silly as I am, I left it at work and completely forgot until tonight. But, alas, tonight I picked it up and it was very yummy. My mother said that she couldn't taste the cheese part, but I could. Yum yum.

Sometimes I wish her and I were the same age, as I think we would make very good friends. I still consider her to be a good friend of mine, but it's sometimes hard to relate to each other when there's a 7 year age difference between us. She's in a different part in her life, joking about getting married and getting old, while I feel as though my life hasn't really started. I really do look forward to working with her.

I sometimes wonder, though, if we'd actually get along outside of work... it's one thing to be work friends, but I don't know if we'd have anything to talk about outside of work...

K is letting me sleep in tomorrow instead of showing up at 7:30 a.m., which is very nice of her. She took Monday off to spend time with her brother, and I thought about taking tomorrow off completely, but then i'd still have to work the other job from 5 to 9, which kind of ruins the day. So i'll be going in around 10 a.m. I think.

I'm staring at this $150 pinned to my bulletin board... I want to spend it... No! I can't! It's savings!

I bought a book this evening called "A Million Bucks by 30". It's by a guy named Alan Corey. I got the title and idea from another blogger by the name of Give me Back my Five Bucks. I'm a big fan of her journal and read it as often as I can. I read the first chapter of the book online, and it made me laugh, something books don't often do. I'm excited about starting it.

In fact, i'm going to wash up, put my jammies on, and crawl into bed with this baby. My dreams will be filled with financial-type-thoughts, i'm sure...

London

I sometimes wonder if i'm going to make it in London. I sometimes wonder if I will end up going at all...

It's a scary prospect - the idea of packing up and 'winging it' in a new city. The ideas of finding an apartment, a job and actually earning money in a city/world that's completely foreign to me makes me anxious. Sometimes I wish I hadn't told anyone... At the same time, I can't wait to go.

I just want to end the year/years/months in the green, not in the red. I still need to find out things like what I expect to earn, as well as what I expect to pay in taxes, fees, bills, etc. Sometimes I think it would be easier to move out here first, but I still stand by my theory that it makes much more sense to purchase a home rather than rent.

I wonder how long the idiots who are faxing me shit will keep trying...whatever they are doing, it's not working...

Spent last night at M's house with his roomate, a little Indian guy. H asked me to go with her, as H and M kissed on New Years Eve and she wasn't sure 'what it all meant'. Turns out, it meant nothing as I had suspected. I figured that all M wanted was something with a pair of lips, and H happened to have a pair of lips. M is gay, or at least bi (maybe even questionning...) anyways. But, of course, since H likes to assume that anything with a penis loves her, I spent the drive home listening to her attempt to corner me in the conversation into saying "yes, he probably kissed you because he has deep feelings for you and wants to get in your pants". Which, of course, I wouldn't say, because I think that it was just a fleeting kiss and he doesn't have romantic feeling for her... which she just didn't want to hear.

Oh the drama....

And, of course, H hasn't even begun to pack up her disaster of a room, which she only owns until the 17th of January. That's right children, the 17th. As in, exactly two weeks from now. To pack up, oh let's see... a couple dozen boxes worth of shit. And that's what it is. Shit. Garbage: Magazines, papers, craft stuff, beauty products.... tons.

Sometimes I'm thankful that I don't drive, that way she can't ask me to pack/ship stuff for her while she's gone. How would I get it to the post office??

My New Years Resolutions

Well, since everyone else seems to be talking regarding New Years and all the goals and plans...here goes.

1) To write shit down.
I always see things and think of things and assume that I will remember them...and I never do. This year, I purchased a book and have already started collecting clippings from magazines/newspapers, etc as well as jotting down ideas I have or that people mention so that when the time comes to buy a gift for anyone, or when I say to myself "oh, I saw that cool thing last month" I will know exactly where to find it.

2) To get a minimum of 6 hours of sleep.
I really don't get enough sleep. I must stop that. I curse my late-ways every morning when my alarm goes off and swear that the following night I will get more sleep. Pattern ensues. Not this year. I will adjust this to more hours should I feel I need them.

3) To get healthy.
I don't want to say "lose weight" because that seems to be a recurring goal of mine that never seems to work. This year, rather than lose pounds, I'd like to get healthy. I want to move to London in the fall and I can't imagine walking around London will be lots of fun while i'm out of breath.

4) To wash my face, floss and brush my teeth EVERY night.
Okay, i'll admit it. I never do any of these before I go to bed. Ever. I wear make-up to bed (although I don't wear a lot of make-up so it's not all bad) and never floss or brush my teeth. I think that, at least for the sake of my skin and teeth, that I should do that.

That's really it. I don't always like the idea of making New Years Resolutions because it seems as though we are all fighting a losing battle. Everyone encourages others to make the resolutions and that "this year will be THE year" and it never pans out. The worst thing people can say is "i'll start tomorrow" because tomorrow will never come.

I am enjoying the texture of stale marshmellows...

I'm kind of glad H isn't staying here permanently. When she left I spent a lot of time wondering what I was going to do without her mindless drama, but since spending some time alone, I've come to realize that I don't enjoy the drama. Her room is still a disaster and I know that I'm going to be asked to bail her out and help her pack/clean. I don't want to. It's actually nice that I'm reasonably busy over the next couple weeks so I don't have to make up excuses not to see her.

I have my own messes to clean up... I don't need her's too.

S lost my memory card. I knew she would. The moment I handed it to her bf to give to her, I thought to myself damn...that's the last time I'm going to see that card... And it was. I'm glad that she put the pictures on her computer so at least I didn't lose those, but that was a nice memory card. It was high-speed and really, the first one I purchased. It has sentimental value. I know she will replace it, eventually, I just wish I had trusted my gut and kept it. From now on, I'll be keeping my memory cards and I will send her the photos. I'm surprising myself as to how pissed I am about her losing it. I know she didn't mean too, but damn, it was mine!

My bank account is sitting surprisingly well for the post-Christmas season. I hate to brag, especially to my, well, scant-broke friends, but I have a decent amount of money - enough to buy, pretty-much anything I want.

K drives me nuts talking about how broke she is constantly. She pulls in around $1,600 a month from the job that we share, plus at least $600 a month at her other job. Yet she's always complaining, complaining, complaining! I just can't see how she is always broke. Her car payments are around $400, rent is $350, plus two phones are $100, bus pass $75, gas is probably $200 a month. Any extras (food, medical stuff, etc) probably run her $300. So, all together that's what, $1,500? Now she's between $10,000 and $15,000 in CC debt, so those minimum payments are probably $300ish (although I think she said she's putting $500 on them) So, even then, even if she is paying out $2,000 a month in bills, she is taking home $200.

The problem is, she's not taking home $200. She's spending it.

Now, I admit, I eat out most days when I work here at the office downtown. Usually runs me between $5 and $20 (depending where I eat, most days it's around $9) and K usually joins me. She usually spends around $7. So, already, she's eating $140 of those dollars every month. Plus, she can be very careless in her spending. When the new IPod touches came out in the fall, she ordered one within days of their release. There goes $450 right there. One afternoon while we were carelessly shopping, she bought a DKNY purse. There goes another $250 there. Now she's decided she wants a Nintendo Wii. That's $300 there. And yet, upon returning to work today from lunch, she states "I can't eat out anymore".

It just doesn't make sense to me! AARRRGHHH!!!

I have to admit, I'm reckless on spending too, but my total monthly bills add up to a whopping $115. A $75 bus-pass and a $40 cell phone bill. That's it. Squat. And I pull in around $1,800 from this job and around $600 from my other job. So that leave me more than $2,000 to do with what I please. So if I go out and buy a $135 Matt & Nat purse (which I loooooove) it's no big deal. I know I can pay with debit and not fear that it's going to come back "insufficient funds".

It just frustrates me that when I try to help her look over her finances or at least let me look at her budget, she declines. I know that not everyone wants help, but I think I could help her, and right now, it's not like she's helping herself at all.

Oh well. I hope she enjoys her new Wii...

Man, i've got to lose some weight. My knees are hurting me. Bad. Boo.

Maybe i'll leave here early. There's nothing for me to do anyways...